2003-04-01 - 11:20 a.m.

its a tense and uncertain day here in brooklyn. after a couple of weeks of sunny weather, i had to bring my plants back inside because the temperatures started dropping down to freezing again at night. today its supposed to snow.

the new moon usually makes me feel better. but my personal life is still in some disarray. its affecting my ability to concentrate on my business, which in turn is making me feel really bad about myself. i need to try to break the cycle.

its amazing how emotions get inverted, perveted. i can tell i'm making myself crazy. but i'm almost helpless to stop it. my heart is racing like a rat in a lab cage. i need to remember to breathe.

the road is long.