2005-11-23 - 4:35 p.m.

it's my birthday today and i'm keeping it uncharacteristically low-key. i went to the museum of modern art with miss w and bought deerskin gloves, continuing two traditions i've repeated almost every year since moving to nyc. tonight i'll have a small party at the lounge, as only a handful of my friends are staying in town. and the journalist is taking me for a roast chicken at the diner.

one annual tradition i won't be able to continue this year is orphan's thanksgiving with my brother. it almost caused me physical pain to cancel this event, but i have to work at my new job.

yesterday my bandmate s took me for a birthday adventure which turned out to be a purification treatment at a korean spa followed by a sumptuous italian meal here in my neighborhood. the purification treatment was a series of scented baths followed by a stint in a steam room that was actually a kind of igloo made of jade. once i was good and disoriented, a tiny woman beckoned me onto a silver massage table, where she scrubbed me with salt from head to toe, coated me with cucumbery goo, and gave me a vigorous whole body massage. i'm pretty sure she scrubbed a full calendar year off of me.

over a meal of rare venison, seasonal tarts, and a wine whose grapes are picked under the light of the full moon, s asked me what the past year had meant to me. so many of my good memories from the last year were from my relationship with my (ex-)collaborator that it was almost a little painful to reflect. but i also toured europe with my band last year, and began a career as a professional photographer, and created some of the best paintings so far.