2003-02-25 - 10:52 a.m.

my browser just crashed when i was in the middle of a thought.

its probably because i was musing about my relationship to the computer. i used to be a web worker and was a slave to the screen for 10 or 12 hours a day. it was to the point that i was developing physical ailments from too much time on the terminals. stiff neck, numb arms and fingers, headaches, poor vision, etc. now that i am no longer forced to spend so much time geeking, i'm always a little wary of getting somehow sucked back in. F uses his computer for everything, downloads all kinds of music, makes music, creates art, writes class plans, you name it. he wouldn't dream of leaving his computer behind during xmas vacation. in contrast, i haven't used my computer for anything more taxing than email in months. my shiny strong titanium powerbook can do all kinds of amazing things, but i've deliberately kept my musical explorations to outboard machines. its as if i think the computer is going to ruin it for me!

i never even really move the powerbook from my desk. its almost ridiculous for me to have a laptop. but i'm afraid of hurting it or something. i see all these geeks down at the verb working on music on their laptops and i think to myself 'aren't they afraid of coffee puddles and sticky spots?!?'.