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SOTU drinking game, 2008

johnnie utah


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SOTU drinking game, 2008 - 2008-01-27
little light - 2007-12-19
hamburger phone - 2007-12-18
why 'grease' is a perfect LA movie - 2007-12-17
recipe: barley treasure - 2007-10-12

2008-01-27 - 6:11 p.m.

stop your grinnin and drop your linen, friends, on Monday night we bid
a fond farewell to GW Bush as he gives his last State of the Union
address. rules have been revised ever so slightly to reflect what Gee
Dubs is most likely to pontificate on this year.

you will need:
- lots of cheap beer (we recommend one six-pack per person)
- at least one friend who won't make fun of you when you're drunk
enough to slur your words
- a television that can withstand various small items tossed at it

the state of the union address will last at least 40 minutes, and
could go as long as an hour. it airs at 9pm EST. same rules apply for
the democratic response immediately after, given this year by Kansas
Governor Kathleen Sebelius.. hard alcohol is not recommended, unless
you have a genuine death wish.

one drink for every mention of:

- energy independence
- secure borders
- global economy
- subprime mortgages
- stimulus package
- working families
- incentives
- moving forward/looking ahead
- political solutions
- market-based solutions
- homeland
- bipartisan
- troop withdrawals

two drinks for every mention of:

- surge
- FISA (Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act)
- Peace in the middle east
- terrorists
- extremists
- democracy in Iraq
- Africa
- the war on terror
- market correction
- speaker of the house/nancy pelosi
- gathering threat/danger
- al-qaeda operatives
- shiites/sunnis/wahabists/kurds
- this great land of ours
- our way of life/American way of life
- his family (three drinks if he mentions wife or mother)

finish your current drink if:

- the president commits any malapropism or mispronunciation or stammers
- the president clenches his jaw or does anything noticeably weird
with his mouth
- the broadcast cuts into or away from bush before he is ready for the cut
- the broadcast cuts away to someone in the audience who obviously
does not agree with the president, is pointedly not clapping, or
registering a protest in any way
- any actual crazy protestors disrupt the speech
- the president tells a soft anecdote about a "real person"
- use of a fake verbform of a noun, i.e. "incentivize", "militarize"

you can force one other person to drink if:

- you can finish any of the president's sentences for him